A not so good life.


Due to depression, my mental health and anxiety is not fine at all. Do anyone else feel like this, like you get up and try but then everything falls apart?
Not even writing down poetry brings any joy like it used to, I tried to write some or look at them but they’re horrible compared to other poets I see here. This is health is bringing down my self esteem and make me not wanna stress myself by getting a job. Argh why me.

(Ps… I’m not getting my first therapy til a couple more months)


I understand 1000%. I’m in a good place right now, but when I was in high school and not getting treatment life was horrible and I didn’t even want to get out of bed, let alone actually find joy in anything.

Even now, comparing myself to other writers is hard. But just remember that you have a perspective that they don’t have, and we all have unique ways of sharing our own story. I don’t know if that helps, but I was really thinking about when I was comparing one of my novels to someone else’s with similar themes. To quote myself “You are different, and your story is an outpouring of you. It’s the reason why we can read hundreds of tales of orphans, of princesses, of spell books and spies, and yet we never grow tired. Because there is something different about each story–it’s soul. Your soul. That is always worthwhile to read, and always important to write.”

Is there any way any way you can get therapy sooner? Or have you looked into online counseling?


Nah uh unfortunately I think and I have but most has been not free but there has been the Crisis Text Line that has been helping me a little.


i know how that feels. things will get better, you just have to get through it. it might sound like im lying but im not, no one ever told me this, i learned from exprience. things might get worse, but thats how things get better. you have to get through the worst parts of it all in order to get to whats better again.


I know how you feel, I personally went through a really traumatic experience that threw me in a down spiral. Worse it was caused by a friend. It caused me to have ptsd and desperation and severe anxiety were I would be so afraid to eat any hot foods. Yeah it was that bad.

I knew after it happened I was going through PTSD symptoms and I denied to myself even though it was clear. I’m not the sort of the person who’s shy or meek. And this made me so afraid and I became a really angry person months later. It took a year to admit to myself finally that there was something wrong.

I got help eventually and now I go to a threrapist and psychologist who prescribed me medicines for depression, high blood pressure and for my sleeping habits that were messed up. I was a complete mess. Now almost three years later I still go through ups and downs but it does get better.

Oh and I’m not gonna tell you that medicines are gonna magicially help you. But I will quote my psychologist. The medicine might not take the pain or what you’re feeling completely away but it’s a crutch. Something to at least help you stand up and help you fight half the battle. It’s okay to get help.

There’s gonna be good and bad times were you relapse, but it doesn’t mean you aren’t getting better. Hope you get the help and get better.



Heres the update:
After a year and two months, I finally went to counseling and I have another one two weeks from now and another one next month.