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#183

Thank you so much for doing this! I would love a review on my YA Contemporary Fantasy story, “Air Born.”

Here is the story link: https://www.wattpad.com/story/165654709-air-born

Thank you again!


#185

I would like a review on The Price of Beauty - possibly the prologue + first chapter if possible? The prologue is only 800 words.

https://www.wattpad.com/story/154260159-the-price-of-beauty


#186

Hello, if you could shoot some criticism my way it would be much appreciated

https://www.wattpad.com/story/59531-death-with-a-side-of-clam-chowder

Thank you ahead of time :yum:


#187

Hi,

Give me your best shot, really need feedback, I have only put up 1 chapter so far anyway.

https://www.wattpad.com/story/169703019-eighteen

Thanks in advance.

Leigh


#188

Hello fellow wattpad users!

It’s Monday evening which means it’s time for my weekly feature, where I’ll go through the stories on this request thread and highlight one I really enjoyed reading. I mostly focus on stories without that many reads, though I suppose if a highly read story does pop up that I think is worth the hype I’d feature that as well. Really, this is sort of my way of both highlighting under-recognized authors on this site and giving everyone on the thread an idea of what style of writing I generally enjoy the most.

This week’s feature is Death With a Side of Clam Chowder by NuclearPotatoes. It’s a dystopian sci fi story though really I feel like such a simple description just does not give this story justice. It does a great job building up both the character and setting in eye catching detail without getting too clogged full of words. I personally loved the main character Isabelle, both her internal narration and her actions.

Something that stuck out to me quickly in this story was the brilliant use of sensory details to really immerse readers into the setting of the story early on. I was actually quite amazed at how few paragraphs I had to read before I really felt like I was in Isabelle’s head, from the vivid descriptions of her ugly city to the smells and non-visual senses, it all came together well. Interestingly enough, the first chapter has very little backstory exposition so a reader wouldn’t really know what Isabelle’s backstory is. However, I think instead of frustrating the reader, it piques their curiosity. The combination of gratuitous present description and a tantalizing absence of expository information is definitely one reason I think this story gives me ideas on how to be a better author. Not to mention I enjoy it as a reader. It’s stories and authors like these that really make this thread worth the time investment for me. Anyway, enough of me babbling on, here’s the link:
https://www.wattpad.com/739514-death-with-a-side-of-clam-chowder-cold-clam


#189

Title: Of Scale & Steel
Author: C.L. Smith

Description: The nations of magic, and machine collide in this epic Fantasy Novel by C.L. Smith. The Terisian Nation has battled Famine, and dwindling resources for decades, but now, a newly discovered continent, Eredos might yield everything they need to save their civilization. The only problem? The indigenous Dominion of Drakengarde. The two nations quickly become embattled in a war for the continent, and it is up to Ezray, a young Draken rider initiate who, along with his scaled companion, must conquer the trials and tribulations necessary to claim the Title of Drakenrider, and save his country from the Terisians, and their infernal machines. Enjoy an Epic High fantasy complete with a lore Glossary.

Disclaimer: There is violence, but no explicit sex, or gore. This book is meant for teens, and adults alike.

Link: https://www.wattpad.com/story/169851911-of-scale-steel


#190

Hey there! I’ve been seeing your analyses in other stories and I really like the way you help people put things into perspective, you have a good eye! I would love if you could read my story and tell me what you think.

The link is here, there’s a prologue but you don’t have to read it since it’s mostly about other characters and what I’m really looking for is feedback on the first chapter. Thank you so much!


#191

:slight_smile:I expect feedback in 24 hrs :wink: I only have 2 chapters… so…
I’m new, so I can’t put a link, but here’s the name: Jade(Author: S.A.Lan)


#192

I explicitly guarantee a 24 hour response time so… your expectations will be met, I guarantee that. Do you mind leaving a link for your story? I generally like having it as it’s possible I’ll search and pull up the wrong one (not likely, but possible).


#193

uh… was I accepted?


#194

Right, I did put you down. In general I’ll respond faster for first chapters and I won’t rewrite an entire analysis for repeats. But yeah, that’s my bad for taking so long, I’ll add some follow up comments soon.


#195

tis fine! I added new start to the book.


#196

So is this the story you’re talking about? There are at least 4 books with the title Jade and this was the one with an author name closest to what you described.

https://www.wattpad.com/story/73326484-jade


#197

It would be cool if you could read any of my stories. I’ve been working on two different type of stories and genres.

Fantasy: https://www.wattpad.com/myworks/170034311-a-world-of-shadows-and-mirrors

Mystery: https://www.wattpad.com/myworks/170032254-the-dark-void

Thankyou in advance! :slight_smile:


#198

I’ve done two chapters, was it three or two can’t remember!


#199

Oh, well thank you so much. I don’t know if you realized but I mostly ask for reads as donations in return for my service. There’s no absolute requirement. Now obviously I’d be flattered if people read more but I want to make it clear no one should feel like it’s a required obligation.


#200

Uhm I have a story that I’m notyet publishing…it’s all under drafts… And it might be a genre not related to what you are interestef in tho…do you.mind giving it a try?? Thanks much,.hope.I.dont take much of your time


#201

H E R E is chapter 1 :slight_smile: And I would appreciate a full length report through PM if that’s okay!


#202

Hey! I would really appreciate some feedback on my story The Hooded Man:

https://www.wattpad.com/story/151473539-the-hooded-man

Thanks so much!


#203

So I do find it helpful if you leave a link of some sort to your story. Doesn’t have to be a wattpad one but just some way of access. And I’ll gladly review all genres.