B l o o m: A plot/prompt shop/additionally a title recommendation shop

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#21

Yeah, for sure!!


#22

Ba-Dump :white_flower:


#23

Ba Dump :white_flower:


#24

Ba-Dump :white_flower:


#25

Ba Dump :white_flower:


#26

Ba-Dump :white_flower:


#27

Ba Dump :white_flower:


#28

CVRRICVLVM

Thriller, it seems to dip more towards horror but the protagonists make a fighting chance for themselves with what little they have and the story has a relatively happy end

The main character(s) are middle school girls

To be safe I will say it’s as long as a novel

R to be safe

I plan to use the plot as a way to brainstorm ideas and critique the ones I have.

Queen

I will post the plot in my next reply. I just wanted to fill the form out and show hat I care.


#29

Oooh horror, I don’t deal too much into that, but I can always try!


#30

Ba-Dump :white_flower:


#31

Ba Dump :white_flower:


#32

Ba-Dump :white_flower:


#33

Ba Dump :white_flower:


#34

Ba-Dump :white_flower:


#35

Ba Dump :white_flower:


#36

Ba-Dump :white_flower:


#37

@RaphaelaLee Hey, are you okay, hun? You’ve been typing for quite awhile.


#38

Sorry for being so long, I’ll show you what I have down so far and I’ll try to put down the rest. Feel free to express your opinions on what I have so far.

So far I have published 3 chapters. I honestly don’t want to change them, but if you think they would be better off if I did feel free to say so.

In those chapters Rue, a middle school student that skipped a previous grade and is in the same class as her older sister Eclair, gets up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water to help her go to sleep. She decides to drink it on a couch in the house’s living room. As she drinks the water she worries about the next day which is her first day in a new school. She starts hearing breathing in the room. Panicked, she hides under the couch cushions and hopes that she will be left alone. Eclair wakes her up and they go to school together. Pretty quickly Rue begins to cry from fear of embarrassing herself somehow and runs off to the girls bathroom to avoid being seen as a baby. She hears someone else cry in the girls bathroom and asks if she is okay. The person comes out of the stall and almost hits Rue with the bathroom stall door. The girl berates Rue for standing in the way of a door that could hit her. Rue asks why she couldn’t just see Rue standing in front of the door to which the girl replies that she is blind and even if she wasn’t it would be common sense to stay away from the door. The girl leaves and then Rue leaves the bathroom in a huff. A purple haired bookworm points her to the direction of her first class. Eclair asks Rue why she suddenly went to the bathroom and Rue lies that her bladder felt like it was about to burst. After class ends and recess begins, a classmate named Nate makes fun of another classmate named Vance and the class hamster Sprocket. This causes Vance to get angry at Nate for making fun of Sprocket. A fight seems about to break out. Nate’s friend Devin tries to stop the fight, but the teacher steps in and the boys become too intimidated of her to keep fighting each other. The rest of the students leave the classroom and even they are afraid of the teacher’s disapproval after the incident. Eclair gets Rue to slip that she is upset because she was treated rudely by a girl she was trying to be nice to. Eclair tries to cheer Rue up but almost trips over reading glasses laying on the ground. Rue tells her she thinks she knows who they belong to and they split up to find the purple haired girl. Eclair calls to Rue that she found her and Rue goes to investigate. She hears Devin telling Nate to stop something and that he will get in trouble if he does.

Here is the rest of the plot labeled in spoilers Rue decides to investigate the voice she hears and finds that Nate is trying to escape school through a garbage chute. Rue tries to stop him arguing that the descent down the cramped and metallic chute would likely injure him. The two argue to a point where Nate loses his temper and impulsively tries to hit her causing her to defend herself by trying to hit his face causing both their attacks to fail. The two proceed to land blows on each other with neither coming out on top. Ms. Paine’s niece Nita Paine sees this fight, but is torn as whether to report it or not. She does not make a decision as the blind girl from before brings the teacher to the scene of the fight. Rue and Nate are sentenced to after school detention and will be barred from recess for the day as punishment. While Nate sulks an glares angrily at at everyone besides Devin Rue accepts this as long as she can tell her sister why she isn’t at recess. Ms. Paine does not allow it saying they need to learn the consequences of their actions. Rue heads to the library where she is ordered to spend the rest of recess Nate does not follow and Rue hears in the background Nate arguing with the teacher. Rue takes a seat at a table and waits for the teacher to tell her when it’s time for class again. Eventually hours pass. Rue becomes aware that she has been in the library longer than recess has been going on. She decides to look for the teacher to find out why. The teacher is not outside the library so she looks in her classroom. The hallways are completely empty and she doesn’t even hear the air conditioner run. She finds that the classroom doesn’t have anyone in it. She rushes towards the principal’s office and is able to see the other classrooms are similarly empty. When she finally gets to the principal’s office nobody is there. She tries to use the phone to call home, but the phone doesn’t work. She concludes that the power is out. She won’t be able to escape because the doors are electrically locked. However she remembers that the library has a book about how to fix the school’s power if something happens to it.


#39

Rue investigates school records and learns that the fuse box that controls the power is located in the gymnasium. She then gets the book from the library and heads to the gymnasium. It is too high up for her to reach on her own so she heads to her classroom to get a chair to help her get higher. She considers using Ms. Paine’s wheeled but easily anchored chair, but cannot bring herself to use a chair that does not belong to her without the owner’s permission. She drags her own chair though the hallways and finally gets it to the gym and uses it to get to the fuse box and as she reads it she finds out that she needs gloves to use the fuse box if she wants to avoid being electrocuted.


#40

Question: Are these main characters, cause if not then this part really does not need to be in there. Unless it relies on some game-changing information I feel that it is not necessary at all.

Also: Going to the start of the spoilers… I thought they were inside so how would he go down the garbage shoot? Unless they are outside.

Next up I think it the last part is fairly confusing and hard to believe. If she were to go to detention then there would need to be a teacher there and surely a janitor would need to lock up the place (as they always do a roundup around night.) I would suggest that she falls asleep during this detention period and she wakes up to see that the power is out or what not cause it would be very unlikely for her to not see a soul or call for help, or the time, with no one passing by where she is unless she was asleep or hidden(as if she had fallen out of her seat.)

The real question I think we both must ask is if this Nate and Devin are main characters if they are, then make this whole playground scene a separate chapter, or leave it out altogether. In my opinion, if this part is important, but not crucial then I would include a sentence or two about it, but I would not go into depth about it cause it really is not that important in my eyes as a reader.

~

Looking at the next comment I find it slightly confusing, and possibly not necessary at all. Why does she need to get a certain chair? If it were me, as the MC, I would not care whos chair I took as long as I could get up there. I would also, most likely, call 911 or walk out of the school, but that is simply what I would do. Ask yourself, what would my MC do in real life? Would they be trying to figure out how to avoid being electrocuted or would they be finding a phone or an exit to this school so that they can get home? Would their parents or sibling be worried? You have to take into account where their items are such as a cell phone and backpack and where the other MC, her sister, is thinking.

*Question *: how long do you plan to make this novel? And what is it about. I understand it is horror, but I need to understand what is going on, whether it is supernatural (paranormal) or not. What adventure is the MC going through?