Beta Readers Needed - Short-Story/LGBTQ Romance/Script!

Hello all! I have just published my one-act play here on Wattpad. I have not seen any stories in this kind of format on here before, so I was hoping to get beta readers to check it out and give me some feedback!

  • Title: The Three Most Difficult Words
  • Genre & Subgenres: Short-story, Contemporary Romance, LGBTQ Romance
  • Description: Samantha and Allison - two very different people - find each other through mutual friends and booze. A romance sparks and begins to bloom, but their contrasting life experiences keep the other just out of reach. The brightest stars always burn the quickest. A story about love and relationships.
  • Other Information: This is in the format of a play script! So preferably I’d be looking for readers who like theatre or at least don’t mind reading in that format :blush:

I can offer payment in a follow, or I can read a chapter of your story and comment my thoughts! Please let me know!

Thank you!

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Hi!
I have just added your script to my ‘beta waiting for feedback’ list :slight_smile: I’ll read it soon.

Just to be sure, would you like to have some feedback on something specific (like the characters, plot, dynamic, etc.) or a general feedback? :slight_smile:

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@marcowiz Hello and thank you!

Any kind of feedback would be great! So general is good, or if there is one thing you personally would like to focus on, I’m all for it!

Would you like me to follow you back, or read a chapter and leave a comment? Let me know!

Hi, I have limited experience with reading scripts but I would be happy to beta read yours. Would you be willing to read my short romance story in exchange? It’s approximately 2000 words.

Mine is as follows:

Title: The Drive
Genre: Contemporary Romance
Blurb: ‘David in my dreams. David before breakfast. David in the shower.’ There’s only one thing on Gemma’s mind lately, and he’s a 6 1’ sandy blonde chiseled, Adonis. The problem is that he’s never noticed her in 8 years. But that will soon change in one drive, one night.
Link: https://www.wattpad.com/story/230083265-the-drive

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@chimera37 Hello! No worries about limited experience, I just didn’t want to mislead anyone that might have thought it would read like a novel. But yes, I’d be willing to do a trade!

Is there anything in particular you’d like me to focus on? Plot/story arc, characters, editing notes, or general? I’ll DM you my feedback once I get feedback from you on my story!

Let me know! :grin:

If you could provide general feedback that included some commentary on the plot/story arc and your interest level as a reader that would be wonderful.

What kind of feedback are you looking for? Would you like me to DM my feedback to you as well? Also, can you drop a link to your work?

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OK Laurel! I really liked it and I have also written a comment on the last scene. here I will make it a little longer. I think it’s a play we all can relate to for the themes involved

:arrow_down: SPOILER :arrow_down:
Money, the desire to have serious relationships, the fear to have serious relationships, being in charge of our parents.
:arrow_up: SPOILER ENDS HERE :arrow_up:

The characters are well painted. I am really impressed for you you made them so clear and real in a not too long play. I think after reading it (or after seeing the performance) we all can find an Allison and a Samantha in our lives (if we ourselves are not one of them…)
I find it also a very easy performance to play, because of the few amount of things needed on the stage. The proof that, if you have a good story to tell and a good way of telling it, you don’t need big stages or decorations or many other things. With your one-act play, you made me feel inside the story and made me feel strong emotions.

:arrow_down: SPOILER :arrow_down:
The parts I liked the most: Samathna’s reaction when Allison tells here the 3 words. (very real for the reaction)
Samantha feeling like she owes something to Allison, the lunch part. (again, very very real)
The ending (open to everything that could happen, no happy ending guaranteed, and again, very real)
:arrow_up: SPOILER ENDS HERE :arrow_up:

I think you captured the people’s real life and struggles. and we all can relate to all the themes you put into the play.

I am sure you will find soon a theatre and actors to perform it!
As I write in the other comment, when I finished reading it I thought about a small theatre here in Barcelona where I went once to see a “micro theater” play! As there are many English speaking people here in Barcelona (living here and tourists) who knows if one day your play will be performed there in English or with a Spanish translation). Moreover, as there the gay community is very active here in Barcelona, it could be an even bigger opportunity… Who knows… :blush:

Just to end my feedback shortly: I really really really liked it.
I have just seen that you posted it with the mark “adult content”. Maybe you could take it off to get even more audience. I haven’t found any strong scene that needs to be rated “adults only”.

I wish you the best! :slight_smile: :+1: :+1: :+1:

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Noted! :grin:

Any kind of feedback is great - feel free to focus on whatever you feel comfortable and confident critiquing! And you can DM me or you can comment it on this thread, either works for me.
Link: https://www.wattpad.com/story/230443077-the-three-most-difficult-words-a-play

Thanks so much!

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Thank you so so much! I changed the rating on it as you suggested.

I’m really glad you saw so much of what I was trying to accomplish! So exciting to hear about international possibilities - if I ever got this play to a point where it was being performed with a translation, that would be unreal :star_struck: I put a lot of heart into the third scene especially (two of the parts you liked most!) so it’s really great to hear it was received well.

Thank you again for your kind feedback! I gave you a follow back as my thanks!

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It’s always a pleasure to read good novels or plays. And it’s very clear when something is written with passion, just like you did with your play! :+1: :wink: In case you write something else in the future, I will absolutely read it! Also, be sure that I will suggest reading your play to the people I know, hoping you will get good opportunities for it to be performed! :crossed_fingers:

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Hi! I am a stage play director/actor/scriptwriter!
I will check your story.
I also wrote a lesbian romance novel. It would be really great if you can read it!

https://www.wattpad.com/story/229981678-after-time

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@Kei_Angelus Hello and thank you!

I saw some of your comments already! I’d be happy to read the first three chapters of your novel and leave comments. Is there anything you’d like me to focus on or look into?

Thanks again!

Yes! It’s nice to find a lesbian romance script too!
Well, maybe anything you want to say? I want you to just be in the story and give me some honest opinions :slight_smile:

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Feedback for The Three Most Difficult Words (Play):

I had a great time reading your script. I had no issue immersing myself into this story world you’ve crafted. The dialogue feels realistic, the characters fleshed-out and well-rounded, and the play has a very relatable premise. The play unfolds in one room between two characters. There is limited action and play progresses almost exclusively through dialogue/ interaction between two characters. I believe using an understated, simple setting and story premise was an effective choice for this one act play. By distilling these story elements to its bare essentials there is nothing to dilute the message of the play or distract the viewer from the powerful dialogue between the two main characters.

THE FOLLOWING CONTAINS SPOILERS:

Not sure the exact restraints of a One Act Play but if I had to make a suggestion, I would have liked to have seen some more backstory of each character. I think it would help further distinguish each character and their personal struggles from one another, as well as providing context for their distinct behavioral traits and personal sensitivities. For example, perhaps you could drop hints through the play that Samantha is struggling financially. Maybe she could be hiding hospital bills while Allison is entering her apartment or she has an earlier phone call with her mother in the beginning of the play. Also, Samantha’s reaction to Allison’s confession is a bit surprising. It is almost like she views relationships as a transaction, and instead of feeling overjoyed by being told she was loved, she feels overwhelmed by the need to reciprocate. Allison on the other hand is eager to love and build a relationship without restraint which is in direct contrast to Samantha’s timid approach to relationships. If there was a way to introduce some backstory on these two characters and the reasons behind their different approaches to relationships I think it would further develop each character, increase the stakes in this new unfolding relationship, and would make the play even more immersive and impactful for the viewer.

(Please let me know if you have any additional questions or want me to clarify anything. Any suggestions for improving my feedback is appreciated too. Thanks for the opportunity for this critique exchange!)

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I’ve done theatre for years and I can beta read your story.
What kind of feedback are you looking for though?
In exchange, you could just read some of my story, if you’re interested in me beta reading for you.
I also only write LGBTQ+ stuff, so it’s in my wheel house.

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