Can a man marry another man?


#1

Hello,
I am always supportive towards lgbtq community but don’t know anything about it. All I know is, everyone deserves to be loved. I don’t understand science nor my school taught me these things. :cry:

I want to write a love story on two men. Not smut, just love, bond and their fairytale wedding. But, I don’t know if two men can marry/love. Can they have children? Also, what they call each other? Who is wife/husband in here?

It will be great if you help me. I will be thank full to you.


#2

The easy answer is depends where u live. Some places legalize it, some don’t


#3

That’s also a big step for the couple so they often go for adoption but sometimes it can also raise some issues when the gay happy couple go to the adoption center and are questioned.

They can call each other whatever they want but honestly I don’t know. It’s never the wife nor husband type of agenda. They should be helping each other equally without producing an authority figure by the title


#4

So you’re going to write a story about their personalities? I support. Great and the best story


#5

Depending where they live they can get legally married and like marriage only some places can they adopt childern so you would have to look at the laws regarding the topic in that country (or state is it takes place in the us because each state has different laws). Most call each other spouses, partners, boyfriend/husband or mates. And to answer the question there is no wife in a relationship of two males as neither of them are females.


#6

Of course they can. It’s just not everywhere that acknowledge that kind of love.
They would call each other husband or partner/life-partner. None of them would be the wife (to say that would be offensive).

There are different ways they could have kids. Adoption, a surrogate, have an IVF child with a good friend, or even have an IVF child with a lesbian. The Victoria’s Secret model Josephine Skriver is an IVF child of a lesbian mother and a gay father. Pretty cool. :smiley:

You should watch Modern Family, there’s a gay couple who adopts a baby in the pilot episode. :+1:


#7

It depends on where you live. The majority of places will allow a gay couple (two men or two women) to marry, but not every place is like this. In some places, specifically where religion is the main source of their culture, it’s extremely illegal to marry or be with someone who is of the same gender. For example, in some places in Saudi Arabia, you can get fines, torture, death sentences, and or life in prison if you were in a romantic relationship with the same gender. In countries like this, most people tend to be in the closet. The only way for them to marry is to leave the country permanently.

No one plays a particular role. You’re either husbands or wives (depending on the gender of the couple). I have noticed that some people may take on particular roles, like one person being more feminine or masculine than the other, but this isn’t how it actually is because… you’re just two people in love. That’s all it is. Your gender doesn’t define who you are as a person—your personality does. A gay relationship is just like a straight relationship. The only difference is how your relationship is perceived to the public because not everyone is open-minded, and thus, may hate you publically. Even in countries where it’s accepted, there are businesses where you are turned away if you are gay. Or will ban something if it has something related to the LGBT+ community. I see something like this on the news quite a lot. I live in America, and while we have many states that accept the community (legal marriage rights), and many places have parades and whatnot, there are still a ton of people who bash the community.

There’s a church in Kansas that honestly is like a hate-cult kind of thing. They hate on everything between military, government, and the LGBT+ community. Their church website is like a trolling website, all about bashing the LGBT+ community.

There’s plenty of bakeries that will turn you away if you’re trying to order a cake for a gay marriage.

There’s a town in Alabama that banned airing Beauty and the Beast (the live action Disney film) because of the subtle gay characters, so you couldn’t see those in their local theaters.

Biologically, no. However, there are plenty of places where they are allowed to adopt children or they could get a surrogate mother to help. Again, it kind of depends on the place they live and how far they are willing to go.

Neil Patrick Harris is gay, and a father of two. His husband is David Burtka.

Jim Parsons recently got married two years ago to his husband Todd Spiewak. They don’t have children, however.

Ellen DeGeneres is married to Portia de Rossi. They also don’t have children.


#8

However, science is close to figuring out how to manipulate other kind of cells into reproductive cells.
Which is pretty cool.


#9

Some countries it’s allowed, some countries it isn’t. As far as having children. They can adopt or they can hire a surrogate of sorts (hiring a woman to carry a baby through one of their sperm).


#10

It does depend on where the couple live as to if they can marry, or have a legal civil partnership. With the children thing (as skimmed over in my story) many opt to have a surrogate and an egg doner, to avoid the issues with paternity suits.

Btw, I wanna read your story!!

I’m a huge LGBT reader, and I even knocked out a love story myself (well…knockING out) x


#11

Not what you’re asking, but I just felt I should say it: People don’t need to be married or to have kids to legitimize their love.

Out of 30 romance books I’ve written there’s one—one married couple.

Not a fan of the ‘they fall in love, get married, have babies and live happily ever after’ linear series of events a lot of romance stories have.


Everyone else on the thread has given you legitimate advice, but I’ll add to it.

Can they get married?

  • It depends on where you live, and what year your story is set in.

  • Some countries/state allow gay people to get married, and some allow them to have civil unions.

  • In countries/states where gay people aren’t allowed to marry it’s common for gay people to have ‘promise/commitment’ ceremonies anyway. It is also not uncommon for them to cohabit—and in some states/countries cohabiting with a romantic partner for a period of 7 years is enough for a ‘common law marriage’ where the state starts treating you like married couple.

Can they have children?

  • Adoption.

  • LGBT+ Co-parenting with another gay couple. (This is where two gay men and two gay women have kids together and co-parent the kids that come out of that union.)

  • Some LGBT+ people have children from previous relationships.

  • Surrogacy (paying someone to carry your child.)

  • Vitro fertilization (Artificial insemination.)


#12

Some countries don’t allow it because marriage used to be between a man and a woman as a way for the woman to own land because they couldn’t. It was a way for the government and a man to control her and people just use that as an excuse for there not being same-sex marriage in some places.

It depends on where they are, Canada had its first same-sex marriage law in 1967, America didn’t have all states until around 2015, Iceland’s had gender neutral marriage laws since 1996, etc.
Although, secret marriages and relationships among same-sex couples have been a thing for God knows how long.


#13
But, I don’t know if two men can marry/love?

They can.

Can they have children?

Two cisgender men could not have children together, but they could adopt or have a surrogate do it for them. Now, if one of them is trans, theoretically they could, but a lot of trans men want nothing to do with that part of their anatomy and also even if they still have their uterus, the hormones they take would make achieving pregnancy much harder than it would for a cis woman. But, that isn’t to say it is impossible. So, sure, two men could have a child together… in that sense.

Also, what they call each other?

Whatever they want to.

Who is wife/husband in here?

They’re both each other’s husbands unless one decides to call the other something different. “Spouse” or “partner” are common choices. Neither are the wife because neither are women.