Character Reactions



“You’ve been reading too many of Edgar Allen Poe’s books…I think.” sighs loudly “All I hear is a love sick heart, and no I am not interested.” stands up “and I have much more interesting things to do, such as find out where that sound is coming from…and it’s not coming from you.”

RT: “I think, we should become best friends forever, and then years later…get married, and then have tons and tons and tons of children…do you like that idea?”


“You really should have planned all this out BEFORE I killed my family and decided to start a war.”

RT: “I. . . am. . . gonna to get fired.”


“Calm down, just because you poured wine all over the nobles and then deuced them in chocolate and…then set fire to the table, that doesn’t mean that you will get fired…” pauses and gulps “MAYBE the cook will forgive you…but that is a maybe, she may not forgive you for being a psychopat–I mean… for being a servant who made a mistake, though I admit, I have gone a little…far…and she forgave me, but I did not go THAT far…”

RT: “I have something to tell you…something really deep, I was the one who murdered everyone in your family…”


“… I think you need to improve the facial expressions. Your voice was convincing, but in order for a good performance for the audience, you need the facial expressions nailed down. Try again!”

React to: “What is that thing?! It’s so big and long!”


“That…is something you do not want to know about, and I didn’t do it, I swear! Just because I am holding an axe and am a dwarf doesn’t mean I would do that…”

RT: “Would you like to rob a bank with me?”


“Yeah. Of course. As long as I’m in charge.”

RT: “How the heck did you do that?”


sassy hair flip. “Because I can.”

React to: “Hi. Are you real?”


“Mm. Sometimes?”

RT: “Hot turkey sandwiches! Get your hot turkey sandwiches here! Real hot gravy and turkey sandwiches made with fresh kitten meat!”


“… Kitten meat? Is it poisonous? Can I have some samples?”

React to: “My dad’s a serial killer. So fuck off. Trust me, I’m not trying to be rude. I’m just trying to warn you.”


“oh yeah and my dad is god. I am not scared of you.”

React to: “I hate this feeling of agony.”


“That’s the whole point. You think I would be doing this to you if it were pleasant?”

React to: “I don’t know why I’m afraid of you.”


“Maybe because I do everything you want to do, but can’t. Or maybe just because your brother is the most important person in your life.”

React to: "You said… you told me you were done with that shit. "


“Oh, did I? Whoops. I guess I lied. Sorry about that. I’m usually an honest one…”

React to: “You… You just had to do it, huh? Couldn’t wait for a few more days. You just had to kill him, didn’t you?”


looks around the room “I think you are talking to the wrong person, and this is a crime scene…and you are to be the perfect prime suspect.”

RT: “I wish you would marry me, and instead of killing everyone I love for once.”


“… How did you know?”

React to: “Wow. Nice dog you’ve got there… Can I keep it?”


“(Where is he when I really need to get out of his polymorph spell!)”

React to: “This favorite book of yours…It needs to be disposed of…”


“Why? Because you’re illiterate?”

React to: “Hi, Bob. I’m Bobberina. Where’s Bobbette?”


“Bobbing with Bobastain. Seriously, don’t open that door.”

RT: “We don’t have what you ordered. Would you like to substitute it for something else?”


“You don’t have Lembas bread? But every restaurant should have Lembas bread!!!” Panics
“Does that mean you are for dwarves instead of elves? SHAME ON YOU!”

RT: “You remind me of Orlando Bloom”


“… Because he played one role with blond hair? Well, that’s stretching it a bit.”

React to: “Oh my… It’s the Ring!!! Frodo, take it!!! Wait, no, don’t! Wait–”