feedback and review


Hello! I’m Jessy and I’m here to give you an honest opinion about your story. I will read two chapters of your book and, after I’m done, share my thoughts about it with you. As payment, you should read my prologue and first chapter. Once you’ve completed the payment, you’ll be added to the queue and I’ll read your story as soon as possible. Please keep in mind that English is not my first language. I can only provide insight about your plot, pace and such, but nothing grammar-related.
Here is the link to my story: Death of the Flowers.



coded by bwttersweet

I’m interested. Let me know if you’re keen on reading mines in exchange:


Description: Nineteen-year-old Luke Sanchez was doing well at college until demons showed up at his campus and possessed his girlfriend. Luckily he solved that problem with a special ability only he possessed: to summon fire from the palm of his hand. The gift was granted to him by the archangel Uriel, one of the seven archangels in Christianity who adopt mentally stagnated children and imbue them with special powers.

However, Luke needed to know more about his heritage, so when the opportunity arrived to study at an academy for his kind up in the Rocky Mountains, he took it, leaving his friends, school, family, and the love of his life behind. He learns that mentally distracted children can only unlock the power within them at the cost of their innocence. And when he gets chosen by the school to carry out a dangerous mission to the Garden of Eden to help “save” a mentally lost child, he encounters monstrous creatures, demons, turned angels, and a betrayal that puts his new school’s safety in jeopardy.

Genres: YA Fantasy


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sure, sounds good

Alright, I’ll add your story

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Are you able to read my story My Promise to You? I’ve only written one chapter so far though

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Ooh, I’ve put your story in my “to read” list already! It would be a great help of you could give me some feedback on mine:

The Consequence of Running

In a sub-rosa government sponsored laboratory hidden from the public eye, Subject 12-0-13 has no reason to expect any different than the torturous experiments conducted on him daily. After all, they’ve not changed in the six years he’s been there.

And the person who’s been watching all this? From the safety of the control room behind the one-way glass, is a simple girl who was stolen from her life six years ago, just like him. What will it take to bring these two unknowing adversaries to fight for their freedom on the same side of the glass?

Read “The Consequence of Running” here!

Thanks a lot!

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Yes! I’ll put you on the queue once you complete the payment.

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accepted! i love your summary

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I’m just about to check yours out now, the blurb is super intriguing!

The Protetturi: The Beginning of the End

The Reapers, creatures of the night, had been murdering people all over the globe. Elizabeth had been the only one to see one of them and live to tell the tale. Since that night, Elizabeth began to feel, see and do things she had not previously. Now, Elizabeth is drawn to the mysterious and dark world filled with demons, vampires, werewolves and The Protetturi – the protectors of the world. She finds herself under the protection of Chase – a member of The Protetturi – who helps her realise what she is, what they are.

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All done! It’s a really great story so far, I’m going to add it to my reading list, so I can read more of it later.

Here is mine :slight_smile:



Synopsis: Fourteen year old Ellie Meyers is about to learn a hard truth: She’s pregnant.

Follow our young heroine through her own version of self discovery and what life is really like dealing with a teenage pregnancy. A heartbreaking, yet remarkable account of love, strength, and overcoming some of life’s greatest obstacles. Grab your tissues, this is going to be a bumpy ride.

As for me? it all started with a test.

Based on a true story.

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@uiiiiiuiuiuiuiuiuiiu @CoralScholes @writerAAPifer

so sorry for still not getting started in your stories! i’m just really busy at the moment, but i’ll try to be faster


It’s no problem! It happens.

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No rush at all lovely! Take all the time you need!

We trust you will keep your promise eventually. Take your time, we’ll be patient :blush:

Hey! I’ve just read your first chapter. Since it’s just the first chapter, there is not that much I can say, but here I go.

From what I can gather, the start of your story had a reminder of what happened in a previous book. I believe that it could be done in a more organic way, so that it could flow better, but that might be because I did not read said previous book. Other than that, I really enjoy your dialogue. It’s natural and very believable! I can’t say much about your writing, but I believe you have potential. I can only wish you good luck :sunny:

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I really love your story! It was interesting and you managed to keep me scrolling through the chapters non-stop. The pacing was perfect. One of the main things I enjoyed were the characters. You managed to convey the MC’s personality in a very subtle, yet clear way and even though Chase barely appeared, I am already curious about him. One thing I have to say, however, is that I wish there was more information about the whole fantasy part of it. More about the reapers, to really build tension and more hints about what the MC is able to do.

Overall, I am enjoying the story so far.

Hey, I read your prologue and first chapter. English might not be your native language, but I can tell that you’re an excellent writer. Could you please read my two chapters too :smiley:


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thank you :sunny: i’ll add you to the queue!

deal! here’s mine

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