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#162

If you’re not overwhelmed, I would love for you to take a look at mine! :slight_smile: There is a little baby prologue, but you can skip it. It’s my first work that I’m sharing and I really want to get better, so lay it on me if you hate it. It’s a fantasy/adventure/political thriller.

Link: https://www.wattpad.com/story/166762806-bearheart


#163

Hey, can you review my short horror story?
It’s called phantom.
I can’t seem to post the link here, can you please go on my profile and see?


#164

Hey there! I have a question: will you only review my first chapter, or would you mind taking a look at a chapter placed further along in the story?


#165

I review one chapter. However, if you request it I will look at any other chapter. If you tell me the context I need to know, I should be fine. It’d be unfair of me to hold a lack of context against you if it isn’t the first chapter.


#166

Okay, great. In that case, would you mind looking at the chapter that I’ve linked below? In my opinion, there isn’t much context that I need to give you. However, if you are confused and ask about a detail in the comments, etc., I will respond based on whether or not I’ve made the answer known previously. Thank you!

https://www.wattpad.com/643097335-lie-to-me-raven


#167

Eh, I can skim through to pick up on things. I’ll mostly be focused on the writing quality and how good the chapter stands on its own.


#168

The writing quality is precisely what I need help with on this chapter, so that’s perfect. Thanks again!


#169

Hello fellow wattpad users!

This is the weekly feature, where I’ll look over all the stories posted to my review service and showcase the one I enjoyed the most. There are just too many undiscovered gems here on wattpad and, though I don’t exactly have a million followers, I’d like to try and do my part to get at least a few of the gems I really enjoyed out there for more people to enjoy. Anyway, on to the feature.

This week’s feature is titled Us, Broken by Octavia Locke. It’s a sci fi with, in my opinion, a really unique premise. Specifically it’s about a company who takes terminally ill or otherwise dying patients and allows them to live their final moments in a virtual reality customized to their pleasure.

What drew my attention to this was not just the interesting premise, which really is unique even after all the sci fis I’ve read, it was also the character development. Often, I’ve seen sci fis focus so much on spectacle and techno-babble that the characters really are just robots and props designed to further the plot with no personality or backstory of their own. I can happily report that this story suffers no such problems. Perhaps it’s my soft spot for sci fi, but the combination of both a fascinating premise and the well developed emotional breadth and backstory of the main protagonist Amanda Cross practically compelled me to add this to my hidden gems reading list. The first person narration is brimming with subtext and emotional tone that not only conveys the needed information but also shows aspects of her personality without needing to explicitly state her disposition. This is definitely something I was glad to have appear on my review service thread.

You can read the story here:
https://www.wattpad.com/634082987-us-broken-nanowrimo-2018-000-dream-weavers


#170

Alright, as far as my records show I have finished every request on here. That means I am currently not reading any requests so if I missed someone, now would be the time to speak up.


#171

@Andyjo1 did you do mine?


#172

I’d appreciate it if you could provide feedback for my ongoing novella:


Dreams of Scale and Bone

[ Fantasy / Mystery ]
"Drika should have been used to that stillness, that waxy pale skin, but Guus Saito wasn't like the cadavers she dissected in class. Though his wrist was cold, he had a faint pulse."

College student Drika Van Meer investigates a boy’s inexplicable illness. With help from her arranged date, she uncovers a conspiracy involving the Holy Imperial College, the Prince of Orange, and a mysterious force with a taste for blood.


Thanks in advance for your time! It’s neat that you’re doing this :relaxed:


#173

would you mind looking again?

https://www.wattpad.com/659856890-masquerading-the-key-a-key-keepers-novel-episode-0


#174

I’d love it if you could read my teen fiction?

https://www.wattpad.com/story/153158425-the-girl-from-swan-lake


#175

I have a crazy fantasy story like you’ve never read ever…

Joking, but this is my story and I wouldn’t mind a comment.

https://www.wattpad.com/story/169477580-the-adventures-of-prince-vajendra


#176

I think so… remind me what the title was again?


#178

oh wow, so ambitious of you to make a promise like this and post in the community forums! I’m prepared for some feedback!

https://www.wattpad.com/story/166994398-cursed-gardens


#179

I’m pretty good at speed reading and over-analyzing literature’s kind of my thing.


#180

Honor Bound


#181

Yeah I’m pretty sure I did. I have the comment on file but it should also be on your page.


#182

thx, just wanted to check…have a nice day :slight_smile: