In Plain Sight - Mystery Novella

  • Propose your story summary of less than 500 words

A young woman named Cassidy Barush is trapped in a world of her own making. Though she is not aware that the world she believes is her own is fabricated.
She starts to have hallucinogenic episodes, which turn her world upside down. These episodes reveal an entirely different reality where her existence, in a new crowd of people who she “knows and trusts” according to her ‘best friend’ is almost the opposite to the world she grew to know and love.
She must follow the clues hidden in plain sight to help her tie up some loose ends and escape the hell that she has created.

  • Propose your intended audience, genre, and length

☆ Adult
☆ Mystery
☆ 22 chapters - I have completed the rewrite currently.

  • Propose your major plotlines/arcs to conclusion

☆ Prologue gives an outsiders perspective on a point that will make sense once the MC figures out her issues. This outsider is a close friend of the mc’s.
☆ Cassie starts having “episodes” where she imagines a different world to the one that she is used two.
☆ Cassie works her way through her “amnesia” of sorts in order to figure out which reality is the real one.
☆ Cassie notices inconsistency between the two “realities” and starts to piece together that neither may be real.
☆ Cassie figures out that she is trapped in her head due to her dead - she doesn’t know this until later - “brother” is trapping her in her brain. He just wants to keep her safe but she needs him to let go so that she can live.
She also figures out that he is keeping her trapped because she is in a coma.
☆ Cassie wakes up and learns about the car accident that killed her brother and partner and put her in a coma for two years.
☆ Quickly breeze over her recovery (may expand this in later revisions).
☆ Have her tell her story to some friends who were out of the loop. This puts her out of her comfort zone as she didn’t feel like she was ready to share that info.
☆ End with the Epilogue, where she’s learnt how to communicate with deceased entities and meets up with her brother for one last time.

  • Any notes or unique things to highlight, under 300 words

I have been advised about my flow being an issue. Other then that I have nothing to say.
I have an ad for the forums!


Edited: Fixed background behind text for light mode users.

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I can’t read the text… might be me on mobile! But I think the font color is too light.

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Are you on light mode? I’m on dark mode. Probably why, I’ve got a off white color. Probably why light mode isn’t visible.

Yeah; I’d recommend changing it to a darker color or just the default text color so that everyone can read it ;^^

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Try now. The white is really harsh on my eyes and typing for so long the white that the text is also hurts. (Also just wanted to try the new trick out that I learnt tbh)

I would honestly just set it to default text; default color will automatically change for Dark Mode, right? This way is also hard to read ;^^ Don’t worry about making it look fancy; just set it to the default settings and leave it that way.

Also: your summary should describe everything that happens in the story, from the beginning to the end. The plotline/arc thing is pretty bare-bones right now; that’d go in the summary with some more details (here’s Nick’s sample for that sort of thing.)

I’m also not sure of your primary conflict and the stakes. That makes the ending much harder, because I can’t tell how the conflict gets resolved there.

I noticed your first three sentences all say the same thing. I think it’s best to be concise: “Cassidy begins to see hallucinations” or something.

It’s not a summary so I can’t evaluate it. You would need to include the entire plotline, not the back cover copy to sell me on reading it.

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Okay. My apologies.