Karan Seraph Critiques (open)



Hi, sorry it took me so long but I’m here to complete my payment but here it is.

feed back:
Your critique helped ease some of my fears about failing to portray my characters the way I wanted to along with the story being action packed. I heeded what you mentioned about editing since I definitely need to do a sweep.

Any suggestions of improvements:
I’ve only one suggestion. In your summary, you could include reactions to the content you’ve read and whether it had a certain impact on how you felt or if it failed to pack it’s intended punch.


I just edited the OP to reopen the service. Requests received this week will go into the queue and I’ll start reading them next week, as I have other reading this week (not related to this service).


Thank you!


Wow, this sounds like such a great service! Thank you for offering it!

Would you mind taking a look at my work?
Username: AugustineReverie
Title : Silver Glass
Chapters: I didn’t catch how many you were offering? Sorry. There are 18, and it’s ongoing, so just read as much as you find interesting or have time for and maybe let me know what made you start to lose interest? If anything?

I will definitely leave a review of your services!
Let me know if you need anything else! :blush:
Thank you!


I’ll add you to the queue after commenting here.

Can you confirm that this is the link to the correct work? I found it with username and title. https://www.wattpad.com/story/163764668

I usually do two chapter per request. After I do at least those chapters and you leave the feedback, you may request again for two more chapters…and so on. This is to allow time for others to enter the queue and to have chapters read.

FYI, I’m getting this Friday night my time, but I have activities scheduled this weekend, so the reading won’t be until Monday.


Yes! That is the correct story, thank you.

There is no rush. Two chapters is great. My chapters are short, so shouldn’t take too long :slight_smile:

Thank you!


Hi, thanks for doing this. If you’re still offering…
Wattpad Username: ellehcelliab
Current title of work to be critiqued: The Ants that Carried Us
URL for the main navigation page of the work to be critiqued: https://www.wattpad.com/story/141811767-the-ants-that-carried-us
Chapters/parts for this request: eh maybe 1 and 2 so it makes sense
Wattpad Category for the work: Fantasy
Type(s) of feedback requested: regular prose, characters
Any type(s) of feedback not wanted: —
Anything else? can you help me subgenre this?


Username: Havingfun_ISKEY
Title: All I See
URL: https://www.wattpad.com/story/160721997-all-i-see
Chapters: Just one so far, which is the prologue. It has over 4000 words, so that should be plenty for now. I wouldn’t want to overload you, lol.
Category: Technically fanfiction. It’s also a psychological thriller, but its official category is fanfiction.
Feedback: Characters, plot, suspense, engagement, does it make sense for taking place in the middle of the story?
Not wanted: Grammar, I’m fine in that department.

Thanks so much :slight_smile:


I added your work the queue.

Can I just ask: I see the work is Open FF, but is it Fanfiction in the category of Real Person Fiction about/inspired by Nathan Sharp only, or is it also set in a world from any game(s) or shows he is associated with?


Nope, no games or shows. The closest you get are some plot points inspired by some of his music videos, but you don’t need to watch the music videos in order to understand the plot.


Thanks so much for this!


Wattpad Username: @rhythmchyc
Current title of work to be critiqued: Perchance to Dream
URL: https://my.w.tt/N95X0hnulR
Chapters/parts for this request: first 3 (subtitled FOR REVIEW)
Wattpad Category for the work: thriller
Type(s) of feedback requested: show vs tell, main character likability, originality, writing style
Any type(s) of feedback not wanted: no
Anything else? No


Username: @JE_Glass
Title of work: Ether Roots
URL: here
Chapters: 1-2
Wattpad category: Fantasy
Types of feedback: General thoughts on the plot, pacing, and characterization
Types of feedback not wanted: None
Anything else: No


@KaranSeraph Can you please review my book called So You Want To Play In Hollywood? There are 3 chapters so far. The genre is Young Adult Contemporary Fiction.


Wattpad Username: LillianAugust
Current title of work to be critiqued: Cross Country
URL for the main navigation page of the work to be critiqued: https://www.wattpad.com/story/161243112-cross-country
Chapters/parts for this request: Is five chapters good? Honestly, as much as you like, so long as you like what you’re reading. I won’t be offended if you don’t like the story.
Wattpad Category for the work: Teen Fiction
Type(s) of feedback requested: Just general feedback on plot flow, characters (I realize my MC may not be likable), the setting, and overall feel of the story.
Any type(s) of feedback not wanted: As long as it’s constructive feedback, I don’t mind what you throw at me so long as I can use it to improve my story.
Anything else? Nah. You sound great.


Username: @storiesweaver
Title: Monsters of Dreams
Link: https://my.w.tt/3ZrKyqONmR
Chapters: 1 and 2
Genre: Fantasy (lgbt characters)
Types of feedback: General feedback about plot, characters, flow/prose. If there’s any grammatical/punctuation/spelling mistakes feel free to point it out.


Hi there! I would love some feedback

Wattpad Username: DeliaMaguire6
Current title of work to be critiqued: Partners [Path Unlocked]
URL for the main navigation page of the work to be critiqued: Link
Chapters/parts for this request: From the beginning, as many as your willing to do
Wattpad Category for the work: Fanfiction - But you don’t need any fandom knowledge to read it
Type(s) of feedback requested: General enjoyability, plot, clarity. Anything that sticks out.
Any type(s) of feedback not wanted: None
Anything else?: No


@hangrypd Can you possible edit and use the form? I realize I didn’t specifically say in the terms that using the form is mandatory, but it makes it easier for me to track assignments, and others have been using it, so now it doesn’t seem fair to put a work into the queue before others that took that extra effort.

Everyone else possibly reading this, I have seen these incoming requests. I’ve been liking them as I view the comments. I’ll update the queue soon, but this weekend has been really busy. (I said a bit about it in comment 25). I’ll go through and check the requests in detail tomorrow morning my time. (It’s bedtime for me now as I comment here.)


Wattpad Username: @JamesHansen806
Current title of work to be critiqued: Sirius Divided
URL for the main navigation page of the work to be critiqued: https://www.wattpad.com/story/165395789-sirius-divided
Chapters/parts for this request: First two parts
Wattpad Category for the work: Science Fiction
Type(s) of feedback requested: What you wrote under ‘For Fiction’ … although the big thing I’m looking for are ‘show-stoppers’ … what would stop someone from wanting to read further.

Many thanks! :smiley:


Hi. Confused about the tense here. I don’t think I delivered the critique yet, but it sounds like you are giving feedback on my critique already.

I do have your work in my current queue, but I don’t recall having read it yet.

But, if you mean these are types of feedback you want in future, I can pay attention to these areas.

No one has to give me ‘payment’ feedback until sometime after I provide them a critique. :slight_smile:


So sorry. Wrong thread.