My sister abandoned the child. We were unable to get any adoption assistance so the process took us four years, three attorneys and our entire savings. In our state the foster care program helps with the financial portion of adoption which is nice, but we made too much money to qualify. We couldn’t even get WIC or anything to help with the baby and we were so young. I was a social worker so some people made more money flipping burgers than I did at the time.
The bio dad was in prison so it was easy as far as him but my sister would show up just enough to fight but then disappear again. We tried to help her get on her feet and raise her baby but she fought us on that too. She would eat up our retainers just in arranging visits the judge ordered then just not show up.
We were young and newlyweds when it happened. It was so hard but my husband is a good man and stuck it out for our little girl. She was two weeks old the first time my sister disappeared. That was Christmas and she left her two older children too, but thank god they had a father.
We were nowhere near ready to be parents but for her, we would have done anything. Parental rights are important but when they override the child’s its sad. My daughter never bonded with her birth mother, it was always myself and my husband. Things got so bad, we would get threats from her “friends” and visits in the middle of the night. We had to change our phone number and move. My daughter is 16 now and we won’t allow my sister near either of our children. It was a long road but our daughter is an honor student, busy with band, a part time job and has a lot of friends. All the hardships were totally worth the chance to be her parents.