Roast your own fantasy novel


Will they want it back later too? That’s how my dad is. My brother gave him a car (so my dad had two) and he refused to let me use it to learn to drive. When the car broke down he asked me if I wanted to buy it from him.


No, I am buying it off of them, but they are getting a bit impatient though, one of the main reasons they wanted me to get a job, I don’t know if they forgot I am alive and I need hygienic things like soap and also feminine products regularly as well as food, clothes and also a chance to do other things.

Also, nobody has anything set aside for me for college and I graduate in 2020. I also want my Bachelors in Creative Writing and need money so I can self publish and such after I graduate. I have goals, dreams, I need money for those things.

Literally all my money has been going to them for the past month, I got paid 217 yesterday, 75 goes to car insurance, 25 was to open my bank account (how much I needed to deposit) and 30 to gas, 50 to my dad, the other 37 was for me, I spent over 20 on stuff I thought was for two cats not one. I spent like 6 on food for myself tonight. I don’t get paid for another 2 weeks and most of that will most likely go to my car insurance.

I also only make 7.80 or 7.90 an hour as I am a minor (under 18) and that is called minor minimum wage, I had 10 hours this week, and I have 8 next week. Plus, the government takes money out for taxes. 217 is how much I had after they took out taxes. On my training check I made 94 dollars (rounding down) and 11 was taken out (rounding down again) which left me with 83 (again, rounding down).

My dad will have to learn to wait for his money (he doesn’t seem to care, it’s my step mom who keeps saying “you gotta figure out how much you’re giving us” and my dad, I do the math, then tell him my plan and he says “ok”)

Ok, rant over, back on topic


Me to me: Your writing and novel, in general, is shit. You’ve spent three fucking days trying to complete one fucking character and you’ve barely thought of a plot. Oh, I know why; every chapter is basically a shitty Spider-Man reboot of another. It’s why you can’t finish it, in the first damn place. You’re too busy rewriting the shit over and over again. I mean, we get it! The MC is supposed to be this “amazing” hero but she’s actually poorly written and her death? Are you for real, bitch? You really wanna kill your POC MC but you’re the main one going at everyone else who does this? Shut your hypocrite ass up.

Alistair? A wanna-be villain that’s as complex as Ferb’s Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated ass nose. All in all, if your novel was a dish and you had Ramsay eat it, he would light that shit on fire and sue you for trying to poison him. I honestly don’t understand why you write or even try to. It was atrocious; every last bit of it. However, I’ll give you an A - for effort.


At least you’re honest.


It’s what we strive to be.


What’s wrong with killing POC MCs? If MC needs to die, they need to die. POC or not.

I could see it being a problem though if you around killing off POC side characters.


What does this mean?


people (person) of color


Yes, but killing your POC for the sake of killing them, so you wouldn’t have to write them is… meh. I killed mine in an explosion, which was stupid because that MC was supposed to be in the sequel. Then, I rewrote the entire story again. Honestly, I’m tired…


Sounds like you weren’t committed. You ran away at the altar.


Ah, ok


If writing was a person, I’d get a divorce.


Not me!


Yeah, me either. I’ve sunk too much time into this relationship to give up now.


I’ve completed drowned. It seems like this captain has went down with its ship. Its relationSHIP. Puns aside, I crashed my Titanic into an iceberg and my ship has been a rotting corpse for a while, now. I’m in the part of the relationship where all I do is read. I read and read until I fall asleep. It’s like crying and eating ice cream while watching rom-coms, but… I’m just reading.


That sounds tragic but also like the beginning of a movie.


Then, it’ll be the first scene of my future screenplay.


My novel in a nutshell:

People with communication issues vie to be the next king by hunting a magical deer


I read your book… It was amazing.


First of all, I HATE the main characters. Jolette is SO ANNOYING? Like, I get that she’s 13 but can she just shut up for a second and not act like such an immature insufferable brat? And Edmian is so weak, what’s with him being scared all the time? He’s not a character, he’s a whiny, wimpy little doormat! They’re both so stupid and the adult characters are way better but of course the story’s not about them, it’s about these dumb useless little kids instead. Scenery descriptions barely make sense if they’re even there, and it’s all way too much about feelings and not enough plot and action scenes. 1/10.

Kidding aside, I really am worried about audience reactions to the main characters because protagonists outside of a certain set of protagonist traits very often get hated for being weak, stupid, useless or annoying by a certain group of people. Doesn’t mean I’ll change them though, they’re kids and they’re supposed to be childish, if entertaining (in Jolette’s case) or frightened and traumatized (in Edmian’s). The rest of the criticisms… I think I can live with that.