Should I expand on my idea?


#1

I got an idea for a sci-fi recently, but I’m not sure if I should write it or not. Here’s the idea:

First, there were dinosaurs. They evolved from living solely underwater and went to land. A meteorite ended that. Then we have humans. Started from walking all fours to what we are now. The creatures I want to include in the story will be after humans. The next “generation” that will conquer Earth. Their original “state” will be what will be in the book. They will grow and develop and adapt like we did. They co-exist with humans until humans go extint, because these creatures are better than humans from their first stage. But of course, humanity won’t go down without a fight. But when hope seems lost the government needs to give everyone the “push” they need to fight with all their might. As kids, the government makes sure they see the ideal life. Joy, pureness, colours, everything good. When they turn 18 (age may change), they reveal to me that what they’ve been seeing and experiencing was not true. The truth is that they are at war with these creatures (I will come up with a name for them sooner or later). They tell them they can have that ideal and peaceful life again if they fight. The main protagonist can see through those lies. There’s no way humanity will go back to what it used to be, because it’s losing control. But if they were fooled once by their sight, how do they know that what they see now, as adults, is indeed the truth? What if it’s another lie? Can the main protagonist fight against these creatures and at the same time find a way to uncover what the government is hiding from them?

What I would like your opinion in:

  • Is it a good idea? Is it worth writing? Does it make sense?
  • If you stumbled upon this on Wattpad would you take a look?
    And whatever else you have to comment about it, I’d love to hear it.

#2

Yes, only because I LOVE idea of the creatures learning about humans in school. Going to events like ‘Walking with the Humans’ ala ‘Walking with the Dinosaurs’ though your idea sounds less ironic than I’m envisioning:joy:

But, I like it. I’m confused, there’s still a human government even as humans are losing against the creatures?

Is it kind of like The Giver as in, there’s a world outside the world where humans exist in this reality that is vague and totally separated from the humans. And once they’re 18, they can enter that world, which is where the creatures live, to fight against them?


#3

And yes, I would take a look


#4

Lol I haven’t imagined entire society of the creatures just yet :rofl: I think since they’re just now starting to grow larger in numbers, and this is their “primal state” that they won’t show signs of speech or anything a human can understand as such. They will be smart in the sense of quickly learning humans’ ways. But maybe that’s just me wanting to make them look beastly :rofl:

There is human government but since humans are much smaller in numbers there are far less areas where humans roam, and far less humans in general. For example the story will take place in the biggest & safest city humans can still live in.

It’s more of a military bubble, per se. The kids are in the most secure spot and they live there but there is still modified vision. They see things more colourful, vibrant, they intensify good things or even make up some that do not exist. I guess a plot hole is that the technology is advanced enough to modify vision but apparently have no other impact in the world. I’ll have to work on that.


#5

Would you like me to go line by line or just answer the questions?


#6

tear my idea apart


#7

Will do! :blush:


#8

thanks! :slight_smile:


#9

Okay. So, first off, dinosaurs. Underwater. How? So, scientifically speaking, dinosaurs are a diverse group of reptiles of the clade Dinosauria. According to a quick google search:

Most reptiles breathe as humans do: They inhale oxygen through their nostrils or mouths. However, aquatic turtles and some snakes also can extract small amounts of oxygen from water. While snakes usually surface to replenish their oxygen stores, they can absorb some oxygen from the water via their skin.

So… tell me, how would your “underwater dinosaurs” live?

Or are you just trying to summarize evolution super briefly and I’m being obtuse?

Moving on, then…

So, do you have a name for them?

I recommend doing some research on what leads to speciation. If you have trouble understanding all the scientific jargon, I can probably help you with this. I took a class on evolutionary biology, so I have a fairly solid understanding of the basics and how it all comes together.

So… if humans “go extinct”, how are they going to fight? Because when a species goes extinct, that means the last living member of the species has died.

Extinction of a particular animal or plant species occurs when there are no more individuals of that species alive anywhere in the world - the species has died out. This is a natural part of evolution. But sometimes extinctions happen at a much faster rate than usual.

I am guessing you don’t want humanity to be 100% gone. Maybe 99% gone, yeah?

That’s not extinction. That would be near extinction but not fully extinct. Not yet.

I always see sci-fi novels say “the government” but what government? Did all the nations in the world just magically combine into one nation? Do all the nations in the world agree on this?

Speaking of… how far into the future are we? How much have things changed since 2018?

How does giving people motivation make them want to fight? With or without the knowledge, I’d think some people would still have the same basic abilities. What can be done to fight these super humans or whatever they are? And why is there a need to fight them? Just because something is better doesn’t mean it has to pose a threat. Why can’t we all just get along? Some of the species of early humans were said to exist at the same time and even interbred. Why doesn’t that happen?

Neanderthals have contributed approximately 1-4% of the genomes of non-African modern humans, although a modern human who lived about 40,000 years ago has been found to have between 6-9% Neanderthal DNA (Fu et al 2015). The evidence we have of Neanderthal-modern human interbreeding sheds light on the expansion of modern humans out of Africa.

I still don’t get this distorting vision thing. Is it, like, an orange is grey but a kid sees it in color?

Like can you paint me a picture of what a kid sees versus what an adult sees?

Is it purely color differences?

And if so, how does color make such a huge difference anyways?

Vague terms with definitions that depend on the person. Are you into black/white morality?

Why 18? And why this elaborate hoax to trick children into doing what, exactly?

If a war was happening, I am 100% sure all the kids would know, especially if it’s in the future. Technology is amazing like that. Kids are a lot more aware of things than they used to be.

Again, this is subjective.

How?

How?

Wouldn’t some of these adults, like, advocate to stop the stupid vision thing if they hated it?

Like why would you continue this trend and condemn another generation to this?

Lol. Stereotypical evil government is evil.


#10

I mean, it has potential, but there are definitely many plotholes you need to fill.

At this stage, probably not. It seems too predictable to me.


#11

i love plotholes, write your story @FetchingPenumbra !


#12

As much as I love encouraging people to write, don’t just throw yourself into it.

I’ve had to throw out THOUSANDS of words of writing due to poor planning.

So, don’t be like me.

Figure out all your super big worldbuilding stuff first before you write.

It will save you a LOT of frustration, words, and time.


#13

Anywho, I’ve got to go to class now.

I’ll leave you with one last link to look over.

It’s yet another close relative to humans, more recent than the others.

It could be fascinating to play around with the idea that this species didn’t go extinct.

And instead, they had been hiding in some remote location for so many years.


#14

and this is the point i realise there are one too many plotholes :rofl:


#15

I ALSO plan poorly but otherwise I’ll use my planning as procrastination…


#16

i never plan :rofl:
Maybe I should give up and focus on my bittersweet romance one-shots :sob:


#17

Don’t give up!

There is a way to fix this.

Boil your story down to its core.

What’s most important to keep?

From there, I can help you build it back up.


#18

Or you can turn it into a fantasy.

In fantasy novels, things are more chill.

I walked to class too fast. r.i.p.


#19

I want the creatures but Idk how to make them :rofl:
I want to keep them being from Earth 'cause I’m not fond of the idea of aliens.

Okay Imma be super honest I want a creature like this: (warning: gore) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iYlIwaUhGi8

In what sense is fantasy more chill?


#20

Well, for one, fantasy has ~magic~

So, you don’t have to worry about science.