The Asexual Thread (All Are Welcome Here!)

So, I have noticed there are no strictly Ace threads on the community site (gasp! lol) so I thought I would make one for us! :smile: I wanted to make a place for us to share our experiences and have a space where even if we don’t feel comfortable with sharing our identity in the real world, we can have this space for ourselves. You can use this as a place to get some issues off your chest, some experiences you have, questions about the community, ect.

Even if you are not Ace, you can still be apart of the fam. The more people who know about us, the better! All we ask is you are here with an open mind, and an open heart.

To those of you who are questioning and not familiar with what Asexual means, it is simply that we lack any sexual attraction. This of course comes as a spectrum and here some easy terms here that are the most popular.

Asexual: The Umbrella term, but is also used for people who lack any sexual attraction at all (like me).

Demisexual: For people who experience sexual attraction after a long time of getting to know someone, and no, this is not just being Allosexual (meaning you have sexual attraction) For most allo people, sexual attraction is almost instant, for Demisexuals this is a long, long process with trust and commitment that could take YEARS for any sexual feelings to develop.

Graysexual: For people who experience very little sexual attraction and at very low amounts.

There are other terms… but there are so many lol. These are the three most commonly used. Even if you are questioning, don’t worry, you don’t really need a label, for me personally it just helps identify and validate my experiences it changes nothing about myself. Let’s start the thread by sharing a bit about yourself and why you are here and let’s get some discussion going! Let’s make this a positive community guys! :heart:

Books with Ace Representation You Might Like:

The Eyes of the Dragon: Stephen King
(A fantasy novel where the main character is an Ace King, even though this was never confirmed it is heavily implied as the story goes on.)

Hello :wave:

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Hello, welcome to the thread!

Okay, I will start by introducing myself. My name is Ariel I am a mystery/thriller writer here on Wattpad. I am an Ace myself, but I don’t really talk about it much in my personal life… but I wanted to make a place here to get out all the things I have kept inside. My other hobbies include: reading, sewing, drawing, baking, and being a fish mom lol. I am a full time college student earning my Master’s in English to become a college professor and a published author, and I work part-time in a grocery store. Can’t wait to connect with all of you! :smiley:

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Thanks :slight_smile: it’s nice to meet ya

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Nice to meet you as well, I take it you are a fellow Ace? Glad that people are already finding this thread! :slight_smile:

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It certainly seems that I am but it’s still something I’m figuring out :sweat_smile:

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Same tbh lol. At this point my lack of interest is so apparent that not only are my friends calling me out, but even my own mother called me out lol. I guess like the cat it kinda out of the bag now. The funny thing is, my dad kept heckling me about being a closeted lesbian one night until my mom is like: “No, she is asexual, she does not have those feelings” I felt both embarrassed and reveled that at least my mom knew who I was and I was not “seeking attention”. So I never really told anyone, after twenty years of no interest they figured it out themselves lmao XD

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My parents just don’t give a shite :joy: My friends on the other hand. They’ve long since given up trying to set me up with both men and women. Of course they then asked what was wrong with me and have now accepted that I’m just not attracted to people. Which some of my friends find very entertaining, especially when their friends don’t know and try to hit on me :joy:

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Aww lol, I had this one girl force me to go on a walk with her just so she could tell me I one day will “have to give it up” one day, and went into disgusting detail of why I should do anything I was not okay with. Then she ended it with “I was just like you… but then my world blossomed!” and I was just shellshocked lol. I seriously always thought having sexual attraction was a joke, like people don’t actually do it for fun but either wanted kids or were curious teens. Needless to say, I’ve never went on a walk with this person again.

Ugh, I’ve had guys friends want to date me… it is the most awkward thing in the world to tell them I am not interested, and of course I tell them it is not them it is me, and depending on their knowledge, sometimes they are like “Oh okay, you must be Asexual then” XD. I think I might be demiromantic… the only crush I’ve ever had was on a guy friend I was very good friends with for nearly a decade and had grown very attached. Though I never told him because A. I was scared my friendship would go south. B. I knew I could not commit to some of the things that would be expected and C. He was Bi and leaned towards men anyway.

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That person sounds like a regular ray of sunshine :face_with_raised_eyebrow: So glad none of my friends ever did that. Instead they just ask me what I think of this person or that person. Though when they pull the “but is he hot?” I just stare like wtaf?

Honestly same. But then I moved away so that never happened. Plus he’s made it extremely clear where I stand in recent months :pensive: Oh well. You win some. You lose some

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Hi, so I’m Andy. I mostly write detective mystery stories. I don’t know if I would qualify as an asexual.

I am a male, attracted to women, yet I don’t date. Part of it is because I work between 72 and 84 hours a week and another part of it is because I can’t find single women close to my age (I’m 40)

I know I’m not an incel or a toxic male because I don’t hate women. In fact, I don’t hate anybody.

I guess I’m just attracted to money :laughing: :joy: :rofl:

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Nice to meet you again! You are the second asexual person I have ever met. One of my friends is demisexual. In the story I am currently writing one of my main character is asexual. I know some stuff due to searching but I’d like to learn more from a real person who experiences it. So would you mind me asking you some questions about yor sexuality?

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Nice to see you again as well lol. :smiley: Yes, of course you can ask questions and I can try and answer them from my own experiences and what I know. :slight_smile: .

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Welcome Andy! Sweet a fellow mystery writer lol. That sounds like very long hours may I ask what you job is? Sounds like some type of management position based on the hours. Being Ace simply means you lack sexual or romantic attraction. Like for me, the thought never crosses my mind and to be honest, I thought people were pulling my leg that they are intimate with one another for fun… I thought it was just for having children or curious naughty teens! Never did I imagine everyone else thought this way but me. I hope that helps explain it a bit lol. Ace or not welcome to the thread! :smiley:

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I’m asexual. Hi!

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Ugh, she was a piece of work. She was a friend of a friend. I did tell my friend to please tell her to leave me alone about that stuff, I am not hurting anyone at all and what is my business is only my own.

Aww, that stinks. I would just think to myself, that I would rather have his friendship, then date or something and loose it all. Romance is not as important to me as friendship. Fellow Aces, at least the ones I have watched on YouTube, have said that the strong feelings people feel for their romantic partner are in a way switched to their friendship. I think that is really validated, at least for me because I honor and treasure my friendships and grow super attached. I am curious if others on the forum feel this way as well.

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Hello there! Welcome to the forum! :smiley: Glad you could join us!

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Thanks for having me!

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No problem, I am glad that already so many people have found this thread. I makes me so excited that people may potentially either learn about us, or have a safe place to be themselves in and share things that have been bothering them. Would you like to introduce yourself to everyone?

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