The Sound of a Siren's Call

Audience: Young Adult
Genre: Fantasy
Length: About 85k words (22k words posted)
Summary:
Arriana, the Deaf daughter of a pirate and siren, spends her life juggling her mother’s world and her father’s. When she goes to spend the night with her mother, she’s drawn into one of the sirens’ routine drownings where she is asked to participate.After an argument with her mother she flees into the small fishing town off the coast.

When she sees her father’s ship engaged in a battle with a Navy ship, Arriana returns to the ocean. The sirens are already there, singing sailors to their deaths. The pirates are wise to the trick, but the Navy isn’t. Arriana and a handful of sympathetic sirens rescue a portion of the Navy crew.

Arriana joins another siren, Juniper, and the sailor she saved, Castor. He has cryptic messages warning of a war with Kiser, but the girls, sheltered and far removed from turbulent politics, only care about the immediate issue of getting the sailors to safety.

Arriana returns to her father’s ship to say goodbye before she leaves with Juniper, but he tells her it’s too dangerous, trying to force her to stay on the ship. Her escape leaves their relationship fractured.

The sirens and pirates team up to stop the rescue, but Arriana plans an escape.

The group comes upon a ship, which they recognize to be foreign. They chance hostility in hopes of a final savior. They all end up as prisoners on the ship.

The crew has been taken prisoner in anticipation of an impending war and they are brought to Camp Beta, a place primarily meant to imprison magical creatures. There, they meet Ryan who signs because of her mute brother, Leland.

Arriana is forced to spend time with Ryan, who she falls in love with despite not trusting her. The two plot to overthrow Camp Beta, the rush of the plan leading to a stolen kiss.

The plan done, the magical creatures hold a trial for Castor’s mistrusted crew. Castor gives a speech that sways them, but the human guards of the camp don’t share the same fate.

News of the revolt has reached the outside world, and the magical creatures have to flee the camp. They find a safe haven where Ryan hatches a new plan.

Castor and Juniper make plans to return home to Regno, but Arriana stays with Ryan. Ryan, Leland, and Arriana go to find a reporter to try to sway public opinion against the anti-magic regime of the current Kiserite president.

They find a reporter, Leo, willing to cover their stories. Leo takes the three to a city to prove validity of the reporting. Leo’s story is published on the front page of a prominent paper, drawing national attention. This makes the trio famous, which draws both welcome and unwelcome attention. Ryan is in the books as having committed several misdemeanors, which is all the reason the government needs to make a prompt arrest.

Other notes: This book will be the first in a series, so that’s why it has an abrupt ending that doesn’t resolve everything.

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I like the edits you’ve made! I’m afraid I can’t be much more helpful than boosting.

Personally, a question I have (that doesn’t need to be resolved in the summary) is to what extent Arriana’s parentage factors into the story. Does she struggle with it? Are there any other pirate/siren kids around? Does anyone ever talk to her about it? I’m big on using speculative fiction as an avenue to discuss social issues, so I’m very curious.

Arriana is also Deaf, so–does everyone know how to sign? Just some people? Also something you don’t have to add in the summary, but I am interested in that as well–while reading the summary I just assumed whoever she spoke to knew how to sign, but I imagine in the water trying to save people that gets complicated.

Hopefully you get better critiques on this! I really like the concept and I’m excited to see it succeed (*‘▽’)

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It’s a huge source of internal conflict the whole way through, first through her needing to get away, then through regret.

Leland is super nosy, so he’s super into talking to her about it, same with the reporter, but not very many other people.

Her parents sign, her mother specifically for her, and her father because cannons blow out your hearing, so it he already knew it for safety and communication reasons. Leland’s mute, so several of the witches know sign as an avenue for communicating with him. Camp Beta (the prison camp) also has sign as a language that’s somewhat secretive so a small population knows it there too. Not many other people do tho.

It does. It gets very awkward in situations (it’s hard to sign when cuddling for example,) but it adds a fun element.

Your critique was insanely helpful, outside eyes help me get out of my own head enough to clarify.

Thank you!

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Revised summary with help from @houseofmirrors

Arriana, the Deaf daughter of a pirate and siren, spends her life juggling two worlds. When she goes to spend the night with her mother, she’s drawn into one of the sirens’ routine drownings where she is asked to participate.After an argument with her mother she flees into the small fishing town off the coast.

When she sees her father’s ship engaged in a battle with a Navy ship, Arriana returns to the ocean. The sirens are already there, singing sailors to their deaths. The pirates are wise to the trick, but the Navy isn’t. Arriana and a handful of sympathetic sirens, including Juniper, rescue a portion of the Navy crew.

Among the rescued is Castor, who has cryptic messages warning of a war with Kiser, but the girls, sheltered and far removed from turbulent politics, only care about the immediate issue of the sailors safety.

Arriana returns to her father’s ship to say goodbye before she leaves with Juniper, but he tells her it’s too dangerous, trying to force her to stay on the ship. Her escape leaves their relationship fractured.
The sirens and pirates team up to stop the rescue, but Arriana plans an escape.

The group comes upon a ship, which they recognize to be foreign. They chance hostility in hopes of a final savior. They all end up as prisoners on the ship.

The crew has been taken prisoner in anticipation of an impending war and they are brought to Camp Beta, a place primarily meant to imprison magical creatures. There, they meet two witches, Ryan who signs because of her mute brother and Leland.

Arriana is forced to spend time with Ryan, who she falls in love with despite not trusting her. The two plot to overthrow Camp Beta by rallying other magical creatures, the rush of the plan leading to a stolen kiss.

The plan completed, the magical creatures hold a trial for Castor’s mistrusted crew. Castor gives a speech that sways them, but the human guards of the camp don’t share the same fate.
News of the revolt has reached the outside world, and the magical creatures have to flee the camp. They find a safe haven where Ryan hatches a new plan.

Castor and Juniper make plans to return home to Regno, while Arriana stays behind. Ryan, Leland, and Arriana go to find a reporter to try to sway public opinion against the anti-magic regime of the current Kiserite president.

They find a reporter willing to cover their stories. Leo takes the three to a city to prove validity of the reporting. Their story is published on the front page of a prominent paper, drawing national attention. Ryan is in the books as having committed several misdemeanors, which is all the reason the government needs to make a prompt arrest.

3 Likes