What kind of personal experiences have helped your writing?


Personal experiences can help make you a better writer. It’s not a secret. What you write could be better if you personally dealt with it yourself than just reading and talking to others about it. But all of us have gone through something, whether it was negative or positive. Can you pinpoint - or slightly, anyway - to what kind of personal experience helped with your writing?

For me, it’s kind of a cliche. It’s been said (at least, so I’ve heard) that writers who endure a lot of pain and suffering are good at writing. I don’t know if I’m good, but I have gone through a lot of pain in my life; family problems, depression, poverty, bullying, losing friends, eating disorder, the whole nine yards. And I do think that over the years, writing - especially on those kinds of topics - have helped make my writing stronger.

I guess that’s why I tend to make depressing stories… xD

So, how about you? Do you think some of your personal experiences have made you a better writer?


I’ve had a lot of shitting experiences in life that I think have helped me in creating characters and capturing the emotions.

My father had a major drug habit who wasn’t the most attentive father. I’ve used that experience with my characters parents in some of my books.

I’ve used past relationships in my stories as well and different struggles I’ve gone through over the years. I think it’s also helped me enjoy writing more. I’ve always enjoyed it, but have a new appreciation for it. Enjoy it for what it is and what it gives back to me.

It’s always been there for me throughout the years and has been an outlet and a friend.


I don’t think I have a lot of personal experiences put in my writing mostly because I consider myself a very light and fluffy writer. In real life, I tend to over think things and cause myself a lot of anxiety. My mom passed away when I was 12 and I was picked on a lot as a kid to the point that I’m still struggling to over come my confidence. Aside from that, I’ve had a good life. I’ve had the typical struggles of trying to find my place in the world, paying the bills, bad relationships, but nothing really strong enough to draw inspiration from. And given I’m almost always knocking myself in one way or another, i prefer my books don’t reflect that attitude. They’re an escape for me as much as they are for my reader.

However, I do base a lot of my characters on the people around me. I have a couple of characters who are vegan based on my old roommate who is vegan. I have sarcastic characters because I’m a very sarcastic person. So I think personality is about the only thing I truly draw inspiration from the world around me.


I’m sorry you went through that…

Yeah, I agree. It can definitely be something that helps you through the rough times - like free therapy sessions. :slight_smile:


Awh, I’m sorry for what you’ve gone through… :slightly_frowning_face:

I’m similar; I tend to overthink a lot, especially once things go south. And not only have I been bullied, but it’s been going on since I started school and it never ended. I even almost took my own life when I was younger. But for me, I’m kind of on the bridge of being pessimistic and being a realist - and if there’s one thing about me that I’m not, I’m definitely not optimistic. So for most of the stories I’ve written, nothing really jumps out as “light and fluffy.” Everything is either violent or depressing… which shows so much of my personality… :joy:

But due to my depressing past, it took a toll on my confidence and self-esteem. So even to today, as an adult, I’m still struggling the same things I had been since elementary school. And with that, I add a lot of what I’ve gone through or my emotions toward something similar in my stories. In a way, I feel like it has helped my writing get stronger when it came down to show the emotions and thoughts of the character; I’ve been able to become descriptive in that aspect.

Though, I find it ironic that I’m better at writing sad stuff than happy stuff. Haha. :rofl:

I, too, base a lot of characters around myself or people I know (or have met). I’ve even used appearance as one of the characteristics!


I got very good at suppressing my emotions so I hid them well which makes it easier to be light and fluffy in my writing LOL I was actually a little surprised when a friend told me that there’s some dark fantasy moments in my book. Thankfully the bullying for me stopped when I finally found my peoples in 11th grade, they’re still my peoples even today (I’m god mother to their children!) and we’re celebrating our 20th reunion. I’ve never attempted suicide but I did hit a real low point in college. My dad had just had a heart attack almost literally after I left for school. I was up in San Francisco, away from home for the first time, almost lost my daddy, had a guy using me just to stay in the country and treated me like shit when I told him I wouldn’t marry him (this was a whopping 1 month into the relationship that he proposed) because my step mom wouldn’t pay for school if I got married, and I just couldn’t deal with it anymore.

So I cut myself. I at least had enough rational thought in my head to realize that wasn’t right before I got too far into it, thus I FINALLY admitted I needed help and I got it. Spent some time on prozac until I found methods to cope that worked for me sans drugs. Prior to that I was always “Fine” whenever anyone asked me if I was okay. I mean my dad and brothers lost my mom too, so it didn’t feel like I should burden them with my stupid problems.

I’m still all kinds of messed up, but I’ve learned ways that work in helping me cope. Even if that way is constantly whining about something that upsets me and getting it off my chest.

Everybody needs an outlet even if that outlet is subconscious. Sounds like for you that outlet is putting your pain into the writing.


So happy you found help and had the strength to figure out different ways of coping. It takes a tremendous amount of strength to admit you need help.


Another cliche, falling in love has helped me write better. I now write some short romance prompts that are relatively short, very soft & sweet but tend to take a sort of melancholic turn. I like it. It’s simplistic, because my writing sucks but I believe it suits it.