That must be hard. I don’t recall ever lacking confidence, even when I was tormented at school for being a brown girl among the English roses. It was awful— day to day, hour to hour— being the focus of so much nastiness, but I never felt like I deserved it.
Mum’s a solicitor (lawyer) and was always so wrapped up in her work that I had a feral childhood, which taught me both self-reliance and low cunning. As long as I came home approximately on time with no major damage, she didn’t much care what I did or where.
One thing that does terrify me: being the centre of attention in a crowd. I hate being stared at. My nerves scream DANGER!
In any event, I hope you can find some ways of dealing with your shyness.